Monday, March 30, 2009

Self-Pity

I've had a bout of self-pity recently for reasons I won't go into because, well, it's just not necessary. I'm not new to feeling sorry for myself.

The remarkable thing about this time around is that Heavenly Father really stopped me in my tracks early on. He wouldn't let it last long. There have been some things happen in the past few days that have really opened my eyes to how blessed I am even though sometimes it doesn't feel that way.

One main thing that made me stop my pity-party is being a member of the Ensley Ward. It's hard to attend church there and continue thinking "Why me?" when so many people around me have so little. Heavenly Father certainly knew what was ahead for me and Collin when he called us there, and I have no doubt in my mind why we're there. I am thankful for the eternal foresight that brought us there.

I have to continue to tell myself that other people may not have my problems, but they sure have problems of their own that are not always known to me.

I guess I'm just trying to say that I'm thankful and there have been many instances recently that are pure blessings. I know that without praying and asking for help in these situations, they wouldn't have happened the way they have.

On another note, I went to Kid's Market today and got a crib mattress, a maternity shirt, and a maternity dress. These are the first things I've bought and it feels good to be getting started, even though it still doesn't quite feel real yet.

2 comments:

The Grays: said...

This is very well written! We all have these days/moments and it's nice to see it verbalized, well written out by you. It's so easy to have self-pity these days, especially when you are pregnant, eh? I try to remember all that I have to be grateful for and keep that forefront in my thoughts, but it is hard at times! BTW, we went yesterday to Kids Market. It was pretty sparce, but we did find a couple of clothing items...

tracyp said...

Well put. I was fighting this myself yesterday and my friend reminded me that if we were to switch problems we'd both probably be crushed under the weight. It seems so easy to think of your life as awful and so hard and it might be for a day or so, but in the eternal perspective... well its just much more clear.